Wow, it was really weird to write those words... This baby has not sunk in yet. End of pregnancy, certainly. New baby, not so much.
We have plans to be induced tomorrow. There's also supposed to be a storm coming in tonight, which often causes labor to begin (for other women, not me) so there's a chance I'll be bumped till later.
I keep telling myself that. I find that if I adjust these kinds of expectations I have much less disappointment in life. This way, I can be super excited if they call me in first thing in the morning (well, not that excited, I would love to sleep in a bit). And if they don't call me in until later, then it's not really any different than I was expecting, so life is still good.
I have had less weak spells these last few weeks than I did earlier in the pregnancy. It's been a bit weird. I have felt worse over all, but it's been a steady feeling and not the up and down that the weak spells give me, so that's a plus!
Mark and I finally decided that we should get ready for the baby to come... We've done a few small things here and there. We bought diapers a few weeks ago. Over the weekend we pulled out the bassinet. Mark's mom has been here all week helping clean the house (it's fallen apart the last few weeks as I have been in survival mode - cleanliness is only necessary to survival up to a point, and anything more quickly becomes a luxury), doing laundry, feeding the kids, and getting the baby clothes/blankets/bedding/etc out and washed and organized.
I spent this week pretending to help, and not being very helpful. I would get asked a question, and it would take so long for me to even process what the question was that by the time I realized I might actually be able to come up with an answer, they had given up on me and gone off to do whatever they felt was best. It was just as well. My answer probably wouldn't have made much sense anyway.
We finally packed a bag this morning. I managed to pull a bag out of the closet, grab 2 things (computer power cord and a shirt) and reach for a third before I couldn't do anymore and had to sit down. It was more than a little bit pathetic... But it is making me excited to almost be done with this part!
Just a few more hours.... Get me to the hospital on time! :)
Thursday, October 3, 2013
Saturday, September 28, 2013
If this is what strength is for...
I was watching Nicholas Nickleby the other day. It popped up on Netflix's recommended watching list after I finished Great Expectations. (I do not pay for Netflix - it's not in the budget. My mom bought an account that lets 4 people stream it, and she let me be one of them - I mostly ignored it until recently when I finished the book series I was reading, and didn't have the brain power to find something else useful to do with my limited energy - so far I've watched Scarlet Pimpernel, Great Expectations and Nicholas Nickleby. There's a theme there, I'm sure...) I had never heard of Nicholas Nickleby before, but according to Mark it's a novel also by Charles Dickens. I guess I could look that up, but I've sort-of learned to take his knowledge of trivia like that for granted. He has always been right in the past...
I just looked it up and discovered two things. One, Mark was right. Two, I spelled it wrong, so I fixed it.
One of the lines in that movie has been stuck with me for a few days now. 'If this is what strength is for, I don't want to be strong.' (or something very much like that)
Background:
I found a support group for caretakers of people with cancer. A few months ago I was having a particularly hard time and went to a once a month meeting for a Women's Cancer Survivor support group in Provo on a whim. I realize that I don't actually fit in with that group - since I'm not the one with cancer (although I feel closer than most spouses of cancer patients because it was in his brain and greatly affected his mental abilities, and for a long time I was carrying more of the burden of his cancer than he was), but they welcomed me anyway.
The first meeting was all about dealing with stress while your body was trying to heal from cancer. Not overly applicable to me, but who can't use a refresher on how to deal with stress? The social worker there offered me a flyer of other support group options if I chose to take them, and apparently I was so far gone emotionally that she also pointed me to a mental health office nearby that I could take advantage of. Did I mention that it had been a hard week? I broke down just talking about my favorite part of summer... It was embarrassing. :) (to be fair, it had not been my best summer ever). Normally, I consider myself doing rather well, all things considered - but that particular evening was not one of those 'doing rather well' moments.
Anyways...
On the flyer of other options was one for caregivers of cancer patients, but it was far away, and on the same night and time as Mark class, so I didn't really consider it an option. Then came another hard few days, and I looked into it a bit more closely. It turned out that the meeting location was almost literally across the street from where Mark went to school, and at almost the same time, and this one met every week. I could carpool with Mark, he could go to class and I could go to this new group! I figured it was worth one trip up just to see what it was like.
I've been going ever since.
The two groups are rather different. The once a month one in Provo is more like a fireside. We get to introduce ourselves and then they have a presentation of some sort with refreshments and mingling afterwards. I have gone to both of those that have come up so far. The next one - this week - is about nutrition and eating well with cancer. I'm not sure that's relevant to me, so I'll probably skip it.
The one up in Murray is more like group therapy. There is no set subject, and every one just talks the whole time - not at the same time, that would be chaotic - but there's a lot of back and forth and chatting about life and challenges and good things and hard things. The social worker just monitors the discussion and throws in a few words or questions here and there, basically keeps things moving and makes sure we stay on topic.
I find both types to be good. There is something nice about being able to just sit without the pressure of having to keep it together while talking about yourself and your challenges, but it's also nice to be able to talk about those challenges and see other people's struggles and realize that even though it seems as if there is no one else dealing with anything like this, there are other people who have been there and are there right now, or who were there a while ago and are now nearing the final stages of this particular struggle with their loved one. For me, there's also something about just talking about issues that makes them no longer consume so much of my attention and energy (writing also helps me with that - which is partly why most of my blog posts are sssoooo long)
So, after that super long lead up to the point (I'm a female, what can I say :) )...
Last week there were three of us in the room, and the two other people there commented on how strong I was (personally, I didn't really believe them at the time, and still don't really. I'm not convinced that anyone else in my shoes would do any differently). But it did make that line from Nicholas Nickleby stand out.
If this is what strength is for, I don't want to be strong.
I just looked it up and discovered two things. One, Mark was right. Two, I spelled it wrong, so I fixed it.
One of the lines in that movie has been stuck with me for a few days now. 'If this is what strength is for, I don't want to be strong.' (or something very much like that)
Background:
I found a support group for caretakers of people with cancer. A few months ago I was having a particularly hard time and went to a once a month meeting for a Women's Cancer Survivor support group in Provo on a whim. I realize that I don't actually fit in with that group - since I'm not the one with cancer (although I feel closer than most spouses of cancer patients because it was in his brain and greatly affected his mental abilities, and for a long time I was carrying more of the burden of his cancer than he was), but they welcomed me anyway.
The first meeting was all about dealing with stress while your body was trying to heal from cancer. Not overly applicable to me, but who can't use a refresher on how to deal with stress? The social worker there offered me a flyer of other support group options if I chose to take them, and apparently I was so far gone emotionally that she also pointed me to a mental health office nearby that I could take advantage of. Did I mention that it had been a hard week? I broke down just talking about my favorite part of summer... It was embarrassing. :) (to be fair, it had not been my best summer ever). Normally, I consider myself doing rather well, all things considered - but that particular evening was not one of those 'doing rather well' moments.
Anyways...
On the flyer of other options was one for caregivers of cancer patients, but it was far away, and on the same night and time as Mark class, so I didn't really consider it an option. Then came another hard few days, and I looked into it a bit more closely. It turned out that the meeting location was almost literally across the street from where Mark went to school, and at almost the same time, and this one met every week. I could carpool with Mark, he could go to class and I could go to this new group! I figured it was worth one trip up just to see what it was like.
I've been going ever since.
The two groups are rather different. The once a month one in Provo is more like a fireside. We get to introduce ourselves and then they have a presentation of some sort with refreshments and mingling afterwards. I have gone to both of those that have come up so far. The next one - this week - is about nutrition and eating well with cancer. I'm not sure that's relevant to me, so I'll probably skip it.
The one up in Murray is more like group therapy. There is no set subject, and every one just talks the whole time - not at the same time, that would be chaotic - but there's a lot of back and forth and chatting about life and challenges and good things and hard things. The social worker just monitors the discussion and throws in a few words or questions here and there, basically keeps things moving and makes sure we stay on topic.
I find both types to be good. There is something nice about being able to just sit without the pressure of having to keep it together while talking about yourself and your challenges, but it's also nice to be able to talk about those challenges and see other people's struggles and realize that even though it seems as if there is no one else dealing with anything like this, there are other people who have been there and are there right now, or who were there a while ago and are now nearing the final stages of this particular struggle with their loved one. For me, there's also something about just talking about issues that makes them no longer consume so much of my attention and energy (writing also helps me with that - which is partly why most of my blog posts are sssoooo long)
So, after that super long lead up to the point (I'm a female, what can I say :) )...
Last week there were three of us in the room, and the two other people there commented on how strong I was (personally, I didn't really believe them at the time, and still don't really. I'm not convinced that anyone else in my shoes would do any differently). But it did make that line from Nicholas Nickleby stand out.
If this is what strength is for, I don't want to be strong.
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Round 2 of Maintenance Chemo
Mark is on his second round of 5 days on chemo three weeks off (technically 23 days, since there's an extra weekend in there, but that's so annoying to say and it takes to long for my brain to figure out how long 23 days is, so I say 3 weeks).
The first round left Mark rather sick and nauseous most of the time. I would love to say that it wore off after he stopped taking chemo, but he still wasn't eating (remnants from the thrush that turned into a gag reflex once the thrush was gone), and I'm pretty sure he got either dehydrated sick or one of those nasty empty stomach sick feelings, and was nauseous from that. After all of that drama it was well over a month of Mark not really eating (a glass of milk or a yogurt here and there, a smoothie a few times a week, probably averaging about 500 calories a day) before he was finally convinced that it was worth trying to get past the gag reflex and try to start eating again so the rest of us didn't have to worry about him. He was awesome and worked at overcoming his lack of desire to eat for my sake! :)
His stomach shrunk quite a bit in that month of not really eating. He can now eat solid food most of the time, but he eats less than a normal grown male would before getting full. An ear of corn and half a small red potato will fill him up. And he seems to only really need to do about that much once or twice a day to be satisfied.
Round 2 of chemo started this week. He took his first pills on Monday night, was sick all day on Tuesday, did really well on Wednesday and is somewhere in between so far today (Thursday). He gets to take his last pills for this round tomorrow night. Hopefully he'll start feeling better next week.
-----------------
Random other news:
Mark came in the bedroom a week or so ago. I have not been feeling or sleeping well with the pregnancy (surprise!) and Mark has been getting up with the kids to get them out the door so I can rest in bed a bit longer. So, Mark came in and informed me that he's worried that Annie (our 2 year old) is going to develop a drug habit.
Now, I was a little tired and mostly out of it, so I was not sure I heard him right... 'A what?!'
'A drug habit.'
'What gives you that idea?'
'Well, I asked her what she wanted for breakfast and she asked for a bowl of opium squares.'
Apparently she had originally asked for Lucky Charms, but she just eats the marshmallows and wastes the rest, so Mark wouldn't let her have that. He offered her some Oatmeal Squares and she gladly accepted by asking, in her cute mispronouncing way, for 'Opium Squares'.
[Mark was teasing, btw - just in case some of you out there thought the brain surgery had actually messed him up that bad. Well, to be fair, it did at first, but he's much better now]
-------------------
Shelly and Jason started school. They were both super excited. I'm mostly excited to have Jason's teacher stop calling me with problems he's having (I appreciate the phone calls, I'm just excited for him to settle down and stop having so many problems). Shelly is settling right in and doing well. Jason is also getting into the routine of daily homework at home and even seems to like doing most of it. He just seems to have a problem or two at school that needs to be worked out.
Emily is a cutie of a 4 year old. She's my girly girl, and I have no idea what to do with a girly girl. She loves doing her own hair (put a headband in it - often missing about 1/3 of what's supposed to go back, or having a chunk sticking straight out the front) and we often find her with random bows and flowers sticking out of her hair at wild and crazy angles. She's not exactly good at doing her hair, but she loves to try.
Emily has also taken to bossing Annie around, now that Emily is the oldest one at home most of the day. It's often funny to watch, but I'm trying to correct the behavior - not the best trend to get into. I'm just too tired most of the time to be able to much about it. Hopefully in another month or so life will settle down a bit and I can find all (or even any) of the energy I seem to be lacking at the moment.
Annie is a chatter box and is in the super cute early 2 year old phase. She has some super strong opinions she is determined to stick to (at least for a minute or two until we can distract her), but she loves to have people laugh with her, so she tries to show off as often as she can.
I had my 36 week check up yesterday (and I'll be 37 weeks tomorrow). The doc was going to set up an induction for me on the 4th - one week early, my first early induction ever - so I can make it to a Cousin Baking Retreat planned for the 12th (in my mother's house - scheduled for the day after my due date - either no one had any idea when I was due, or someone was being rude and trying to not invite me! Turns out the joke is on them, I'm coming anyway :) )
It's been a busy few weeks on the farm. Mark and the kids and I have spent much of the last few weeks over at his mom's house helping get all the garden produce harvested and stored away for the upcoming year. Sadly, neither one of us is as helpful as we usually are... Mark has had to take over my job cooking corn, cutting tomatoes, running stuff through the juicer, etc. several times, and we usually show up after all the picking has been done (part of that is the kids late start with school, but not all of it - it takes a long time to get us out the door these days). I'm just grateful for such an awesome mother in law! If nothing else, I enjoy sitting in her kitchen and chatting about everything and nothing all at the same time.
I'm sure there's more, but my brain stopped working a few weeks ago. It's amazing I'm even able to form complete sentences at the moment - that's not always the case these days. :)
Friday, August 16, 2013
Picking up Shelly and Jason from Camp
Last week was the first camp that either Shelly or Jason have been to. I was never really worried about Shelly. She is incredibly adaptable and goes along with almost anything and she loves to do the type of things that go on at camp. Jason, however, is not that type. He gave me cause to worry about how he would handle camp. He's been away from home before, I wasn't too worried about that. His adventures would come in other forms.
So, it's no surprise that I was a little bit nervous to hear from the counselors how he handled camp. Once we were parked and heading in (with the two little ones in tow), word got out that we were Chomper's family and there was rather a bit of a reaction. This was not reassuring. We had told one of the counselors (Nike) that we were looking for Pillow and Chomper, but somehow Chomper's name was the one that she mentioned to others - I was unsure if this was a good sign or a bad sign...
We headed into the mess hall to meet the kids and Shelly ran up and grabbed Mark to give him a hug. She spent most of the rest of the time showing us the stuff she made and playing with Emily and Annie. Jason was going through his camp stuff at the table when we came in and didn't see us immediately. Once he saw us he excitedly told us all about how much fun he had, the things he got to do and the people he met - at least I think that's what he was telling us. He was talking so fast (and there was a lot of other noise in the room) that it was hard to understand everything he was saying...
Their unit counselor, Bubbles, was nearby, so once I got a break I asked her how the kids did (but I must confess to mostly being curious about Jason - I didn't think Shelly's experience was really in question).
Her response - about Jason: "He was definitely the most rewarding camper." I was pretty sure this was code for challenging. Great reward really only comes with great effort after all...
So, Shelly had changed her name just a few minutes after we left. She went from Pillow to Butterfly (which would explain why only Chomper's name was memorable to Nike when she announcing our arrival - that was reassuring). Jason also changed his name, but he changed his mid-week. Apparently, when a camper or counselor calls someone the wrong name, they have to kiss a tree. Jason somehow figured out a way to take advantage of this and decided that it would be fun to make everyone kiss trees, so in an effort to confuse people and trick them into calling him the wrong name, he changed his name from Chomper to Zombie ... on Wednesday ... and then proceeded to have a great day making everyone kiss a tree...
So, we left a Pillow and a Chomper at camp and came back with a Butterfly and a Zombie...
Shelly did all of the crafts and had a large collection of stuff to show us when we got there. It was fun to watch her show off all of the stuff she made.
Jason only did some of the crafts - but to tell you the truth, I'm impressed they got him to do any at all (one or two of the more 'special' ones someone else did for him, just so he would have one to bring home). He was awesome at the running around games; tag, capture the flag, the treasure hunt, and things like that. He refused to go swimming and spent swim time playing in the nearby playground instead. He also won a huge jar of jelly beans at the carnival. He guessed how many were in the jar (he guessed 1,000) and won!
Showers were also not his thing. (He's still doing baths at home - it's easier to throw him in with the younger girls still - that was our fault) He told Bubbles that he was excited to come back next year, but only if he didn't have to take a shower. Bubbles laughed good and hard about that comment!
Turns out his cabin counselor's name was not Master Po. His name was Mumble. I got the face right but the name mixed up. Mumble was good with Jason too. Both he and Bubbles were so excited with Jason on the last night there. They had finally convinced Jason to participate and he got up on stage during the talent program! They were both way excited by that accomplishment. Turns out Jason was the youngest camper there, which I'm sure added a bit of drama to the personality that is Jason... :)
One of the things Jason told me right at the beginning, while he was still talking in his 'excited about camp' voice, was that he now has a Dream Castle. It's supposed to hold all of the nightmares so they can't get out (at least, I think that's how it went, it was loud and he was talking quickly and his speech issues are at their worst in those situations - and I was distracted). I meant to ask him where he got that from, but I completely forgot until right now, and Mark is getting them dinner while I type, so it will have to wait until later.
Shelly had fun on the way home telling us everything they did at camp. She sang some songs for us, told us about an empowerment circle they did (they all took turns talking and then they got a balloon they could write their worries and fears on and then let the balloons go), she told us how much fun swimming was and that the pool there was only 5 feet deep and she jumped in and touched the bottom of the pool (with her feet) before swimming to the ladder. Somewhere in there she asked if she could stop talking, so we let her take a break.
I believe that's about everything I know about how camp went...
And now you know too (if you actually read that whole thing...)
UPDATE: So, while I was putting the kidlets to bed, Jason mentioned his Dream Castle again. Just as I was about to ask him about it, he showed it to me. It was a dream catcher... (from native american culture - tell me you know what I'm talking about...) Turns out it was a hearing problem on my part and not a nightmare problem on his part requiring therapeutic intervention. That's good news! :)
So, it's no surprise that I was a little bit nervous to hear from the counselors how he handled camp. Once we were parked and heading in (with the two little ones in tow), word got out that we were Chomper's family and there was rather a bit of a reaction. This was not reassuring. We had told one of the counselors (Nike) that we were looking for Pillow and Chomper, but somehow Chomper's name was the one that she mentioned to others - I was unsure if this was a good sign or a bad sign...
We headed into the mess hall to meet the kids and Shelly ran up and grabbed Mark to give him a hug. She spent most of the rest of the time showing us the stuff she made and playing with Emily and Annie. Jason was going through his camp stuff at the table when we came in and didn't see us immediately. Once he saw us he excitedly told us all about how much fun he had, the things he got to do and the people he met - at least I think that's what he was telling us. He was talking so fast (and there was a lot of other noise in the room) that it was hard to understand everything he was saying...
Their unit counselor, Bubbles, was nearby, so once I got a break I asked her how the kids did (but I must confess to mostly being curious about Jason - I didn't think Shelly's experience was really in question).
Her response - about Jason: "He was definitely the most rewarding camper." I was pretty sure this was code for challenging. Great reward really only comes with great effort after all...
So, Shelly had changed her name just a few minutes after we left. She went from Pillow to Butterfly (which would explain why only Chomper's name was memorable to Nike when she announcing our arrival - that was reassuring). Jason also changed his name, but he changed his mid-week. Apparently, when a camper or counselor calls someone the wrong name, they have to kiss a tree. Jason somehow figured out a way to take advantage of this and decided that it would be fun to make everyone kiss trees, so in an effort to confuse people and trick them into calling him the wrong name, he changed his name from Chomper to Zombie ... on Wednesday ... and then proceeded to have a great day making everyone kiss a tree...
So, we left a Pillow and a Chomper at camp and came back with a Butterfly and a Zombie...
Shelly did all of the crafts and had a large collection of stuff to show us when we got there. It was fun to watch her show off all of the stuff she made.
Jason only did some of the crafts - but to tell you the truth, I'm impressed they got him to do any at all (one or two of the more 'special' ones someone else did for him, just so he would have one to bring home). He was awesome at the running around games; tag, capture the flag, the treasure hunt, and things like that. He refused to go swimming and spent swim time playing in the nearby playground instead. He also won a huge jar of jelly beans at the carnival. He guessed how many were in the jar (he guessed 1,000) and won!
Showers were also not his thing. (He's still doing baths at home - it's easier to throw him in with the younger girls still - that was our fault) He told Bubbles that he was excited to come back next year, but only if he didn't have to take a shower. Bubbles laughed good and hard about that comment!
Turns out his cabin counselor's name was not Master Po. His name was Mumble. I got the face right but the name mixed up. Mumble was good with Jason too. Both he and Bubbles were so excited with Jason on the last night there. They had finally convinced Jason to participate and he got up on stage during the talent program! They were both way excited by that accomplishment. Turns out Jason was the youngest camper there, which I'm sure added a bit of drama to the personality that is Jason... :)
One of the things Jason told me right at the beginning, while he was still talking in his 'excited about camp' voice, was that he now has a Dream Castle. It's supposed to hold all of the nightmares so they can't get out (at least, I think that's how it went, it was loud and he was talking quickly and his speech issues are at their worst in those situations - and I was distracted). I meant to ask him where he got that from, but I completely forgot until right now, and Mark is getting them dinner while I type, so it will have to wait until later.
Shelly had fun on the way home telling us everything they did at camp. She sang some songs for us, told us about an empowerment circle they did (they all took turns talking and then they got a balloon they could write their worries and fears on and then let the balloons go), she told us how much fun swimming was and that the pool there was only 5 feet deep and she jumped in and touched the bottom of the pool (with her feet) before swimming to the ladder. Somewhere in there she asked if she could stop talking, so we let her take a break.
I believe that's about everything I know about how camp went...
And now you know too (if you actually read that whole thing...)
UPDATE: So, while I was putting the kidlets to bed, Jason mentioned his Dream Castle again. Just as I was about to ask him about it, he showed it to me. It was a dream catcher... (from native american culture - tell me you know what I'm talking about...) Turns out it was a hearing problem on my part and not a nightmare problem on his part requiring therapeutic intervention. That's good news! :)
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Thanksgiving Point
I recently found out that there are $2 Tuesdays in August at Thanksgiving Point. I had no idea. But since I found this out on Monday night, I actually still remembered the next morning and thought it would be fun to go and take the kids, well at least the two that are left here (Shelly and Jason are at camp).
It was an adventure. We started off by waiting in a rather long line just to get in to the park. Emily had cut her toe the day before and shoes hurt her foot. In typical 4 year old fashion, she had refused to wear flip flops that would not put pressure on her toe, so she got to sit in the stroller with one shoe off.
Once we got in, we got to see a couple of cows and horses, and then the kids saw the pony ride. Emily decided she could wear the flip flops we brought for her, and then refused to go anywhere except in line for the pony ride. So we waited in a long line again... We were finally the next ones in line and Emily announces she needs to use the restroom. I convinced her to wait until after our turn. Annie was super excited to go on the pony ride, and then refused to get on the pony. She would pet it, and eventually held onto the saddle for the last 10 feet. That's about it.
Then Emily took 15 minutes in the bathroom, we saw a few goats (Annie was really funny when a goat would stick it's nose through the fence - she would pet it super quickly and then laugh and say 'I tickled it!'), we saw some sheep and chickens and decided there wasn't much else to see, it was hot and we had been there for over 2 hours and done not a whole lot with not much else to do, and it was time to go get something to eat and cold to drink, so we left.
Turns out we should have planned that better. On our way out we noticed that the line to get in was basically non-existent, and since it was after lunch by that time, we would not have been quite as hungry. Next time we'll know better...
It was an adventure. We started off by waiting in a rather long line just to get in to the park. Emily had cut her toe the day before and shoes hurt her foot. In typical 4 year old fashion, she had refused to wear flip flops that would not put pressure on her toe, so she got to sit in the stroller with one shoe off.
Once we got in, we got to see a couple of cows and horses, and then the kids saw the pony ride. Emily decided she could wear the flip flops we brought for her, and then refused to go anywhere except in line for the pony ride. So we waited in a long line again... We were finally the next ones in line and Emily announces she needs to use the restroom. I convinced her to wait until after our turn. Annie was super excited to go on the pony ride, and then refused to get on the pony. She would pet it, and eventually held onto the saddle for the last 10 feet. That's about it.
Then Emily took 15 minutes in the bathroom, we saw a few goats (Annie was really funny when a goat would stick it's nose through the fence - she would pet it super quickly and then laugh and say 'I tickled it!'), we saw some sheep and chickens and decided there wasn't much else to see, it was hot and we had been there for over 2 hours and done not a whole lot with not much else to do, and it was time to go get something to eat and cold to drink, so we left.
Turns out we should have planned that better. On our way out we noticed that the line to get in was basically non-existent, and since it was after lunch by that time, we would not have been quite as hungry. Next time we'll know better...
Camp Kesem
A couple of months ago my awesome aunt sent me some info about a camp that I had never heard of before. It's a camp for kids who have/had parents with cancer. It's a fun opportunity for the kids to have a great time in the company of other kids who have something in common with them. Camp Kesem is a nation wide thing, and it's basically run by volunteer college students. The one for BYU was long since full by the time we heard about it, but SUU was still looking for campers (and SUU's camp was going to be closer to our house than their campus, so distance wasn't an issue). After looking into it a bit (I didn't want this to give the kids issues they didn't have before going there...) and chatting with my aunt a few times about her thoughts and what she had heard and knew about it, we decided to sign the kids up! The kids have to be at least 6 years old, so only Shelly and Jason were able to go. Emily has had a bit of hard time with that...
Jason and Shelly have been anxiously looking forward to it all summer. I usually don't tell the kids about things too far in advance of big events - I dislike the ups and downs and drama that is kids waiting on pins and needles. This time though, I was worried about Jason and whether he would actually want to go to a camp, so I asked the kids before I even signed them up. This summer has been rather full of questions about when it is, where it is, how they're getting there, what stuff they will do there...
The day finally came! On Sunday we drove up to the camp to drop them off. Poor Shelly got carsick about 5 miles from camp, but even still, she was excited to go. Jason was also excited, until we got out to go register them. Apparently everyone there picks a camp name, any name they want. The people at registration were Chocolate Fury, Master Po, Bubbles, Starburst, Nala, Mufasa, Pumba, M&M - names like that. The idea is that they can be whoever they want to be at camp. None of the paperwork they sent me said anything about that, so I didn't know to warn them about it and give them time to come up with a name. This did not phase Shelly. She came up with a name in under a minute. She chose 'Pillow' to be her camp name. Jason had a harder time coming up with a name. Eventually we decided to do a tour of the camp, pick a bed and come back to name picking later. He spent the next most of an hour telling me he wanted to go home. The councilors there were very good with him. His cabin councilor was Master Po, and was super patient with him when he refused to pick a bed (we finally just picked one for him and moved on - I did tell him that once we were done checking in Shelly, if he still didn't want to stay I wouldn't make him). We then went to hang out on the grass with the kids' unit councilor Bubbles (I have no idea what her actual name is) - Shelly and Jason are in the same activities unit. She was also awesome with him, we played a game and then Bubbles took her kids that were already there (Pillow, Ells, and Pillow's un-named little brother) to the mess hall to see M&M and get a snack. While there Bubbles managed to soften Jason up a bit, ask some questions of the kids and we finally got Jason to the point where he came up with a name that he liked. He chose Chomper (the baby t-rex from the Land Before Time series).
Once Jason had a name he was back to his happy self again, and more than willing to stay at camp. We got him a name tag, kissed the kids goodbye and drove away, confident that the kids were in good hands.
We pick them up on Friday. I confess I'm a little bit curious how Jason will handle camp. He has a bit of a stubborn personality (as I'm sure anyone who's interacted with him for more than 5 minutes has noticed) and is rather strong willed. I think I read somewhere that they will have stuff set up for the kids to show off what they did during camp at pick-up time. I can already picture Shelly's spot full of fun crafts and adventures, and Jason' spot completely empty - with maybe a picture that someone else colored in for him with his name on it... He is not a craft person. I just hope he manages to have fun at least some of the time, and not ruin camp for some poor counselor who gets to sit with him when he's grumpy. I guess we'll find out on Friday...
Jason and Shelly have been anxiously looking forward to it all summer. I usually don't tell the kids about things too far in advance of big events - I dislike the ups and downs and drama that is kids waiting on pins and needles. This time though, I was worried about Jason and whether he would actually want to go to a camp, so I asked the kids before I even signed them up. This summer has been rather full of questions about when it is, where it is, how they're getting there, what stuff they will do there...
The day finally came! On Sunday we drove up to the camp to drop them off. Poor Shelly got carsick about 5 miles from camp, but even still, she was excited to go. Jason was also excited, until we got out to go register them. Apparently everyone there picks a camp name, any name they want. The people at registration were Chocolate Fury, Master Po, Bubbles, Starburst, Nala, Mufasa, Pumba, M&M - names like that. The idea is that they can be whoever they want to be at camp. None of the paperwork they sent me said anything about that, so I didn't know to warn them about it and give them time to come up with a name. This did not phase Shelly. She came up with a name in under a minute. She chose 'Pillow' to be her camp name. Jason had a harder time coming up with a name. Eventually we decided to do a tour of the camp, pick a bed and come back to name picking later. He spent the next most of an hour telling me he wanted to go home. The councilors there were very good with him. His cabin councilor was Master Po, and was super patient with him when he refused to pick a bed (we finally just picked one for him and moved on - I did tell him that once we were done checking in Shelly, if he still didn't want to stay I wouldn't make him). We then went to hang out on the grass with the kids' unit councilor Bubbles (I have no idea what her actual name is) - Shelly and Jason are in the same activities unit. She was also awesome with him, we played a game and then Bubbles took her kids that were already there (Pillow, Ells, and Pillow's un-named little brother) to the mess hall to see M&M and get a snack. While there Bubbles managed to soften Jason up a bit, ask some questions of the kids and we finally got Jason to the point where he came up with a name that he liked. He chose Chomper (the baby t-rex from the Land Before Time series).
Once Jason had a name he was back to his happy self again, and more than willing to stay at camp. We got him a name tag, kissed the kids goodbye and drove away, confident that the kids were in good hands.
We pick them up on Friday. I confess I'm a little bit curious how Jason will handle camp. He has a bit of a stubborn personality (as I'm sure anyone who's interacted with him for more than 5 minutes has noticed) and is rather strong willed. I think I read somewhere that they will have stuff set up for the kids to show off what they did during camp at pick-up time. I can already picture Shelly's spot full of fun crafts and adventures, and Jason' spot completely empty - with maybe a picture that someone else colored in for him with his name on it... He is not a craft person. I just hope he manages to have fun at least some of the time, and not ruin camp for some poor counselor who gets to sit with him when he's grumpy. I guess we'll find out on Friday...
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
It's Been a While...
I'm pretty sure that, for anyone who's followed this blog for longer a few months, it comes as no surprise that I am totally inconsistent in keeping it up. I know if you look back through the dates, it looks like I was pretty good (at least until about 1 year before Mark's tumor), but most of those were done over a weekend and I would do 3-6 months or so at a time and cheat on the dates.... This most recent stretch has been the most consistent I've been in years about it. Go me! Too bad I've failed miserably over the last few weeks...
So, now I'll update several weeks in one shot and hope this makes up for my slacking off.
Mark finished his last radiation treatment on Monday (the 22nd). That Thursday we were back in the office again with Mark complaining of things not tasting good. Turns out he managed to get thrush in his mouth. Apparently it's caused by a fungus (yeast) that most of us have on our bodies naturally anyways. Usually our immune system will help keep its abnormal growth in check, but since Mark's immune system is anything but normal at the moment, the fungus (yeast) got out of control and now he has thrush (and subsequently can't eat too much of anything solid without getting sick)
We have tried a couple of different things to get rid of it. He was on an oral pill for a while, but that didn't even seem to make a dent. After a few slightly frustrating phone calls to the doctors offices (yes, two of them), we were basically told they had no idea what to do about it since that didn't work. On a spur of the moment trip to a women's cancer survivor support group at the radiation office, the nurse there was surprised that who ever I talked to didn't have an answer, and she had me bring Mark back in to see the doctor the next day. Mark got a new prescription for an oral wash. He does not love that stuff (it is so nasty! - I made the mistake of trying just a tiny drop of it - just so I knew what it was I was pushing Mark to do when he didn't want to swish the meds in his mouth - yea, I'm not doing that again...) We thought it was making a difference, and it might be, but it's not enough. He still can't eat. We're coming up on 3 weeks soon.
On a positive note, he's lost a lot of the extra weight the steroids put on him! Somehow I'm sure that not eating for the last few weeks has helped with that...
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Over the last weekend in July we went on our Annual Gardner Campout. Technically, it was the first year, but we're pretending we've been doing this for as long as we can remember... :) We went to Flaming Gorge and had a blast. Mark still couldn't eat, my brother had a rather severe reaction to a bite (bite on his back - face and lips swollen... yea, it was pretty bad), Emily got lost hiking, everyone was filthy - the youngest of us got that the worst, it rained two of the nights, and we brought way too much food with us that we had to sort through to find what we were cooking for any given meal.
Actually, that makes it sound bad, but it really was fun to get to see everyone and most of us have camping gear that rarely gets used, so it was fun to break that out. We even got to see some old friends that we haven't seen in years. Greg and Paula heard of our camping trip and came and spent a night with us. It was fun to see them again and spend some time catching up and playing games. We all got to go to the Dinosaur museum in Vernal (where we randomly ran into friends that Mark knew growing up and that we had gone to church with for a while before we moved). We also got to go the water at Flaming Gorge and played there for a while, some swimming, some toe dipping, some skipping rocks. We made s'mores and wump-ums, roasted starbursts and sour gummy worms (not sure I recommend that last one - it was an experiment for my Dad, but he didn't seem impressed and apparently it was hard to get them to stay on the stick...), we got an astronomy lesson with a laser pointer (on the first night before the clouds started taking over the evenings) and the kids stayed up late and went on many hikes with aunts, uncles, dads, and grandparents (no, I did not go with them, I'm a horrible mother - and I'm many months pregnant - hiking is not currently my thing... I'm just glad that other people were willing to take that part over for me :) )
After all is said done, we're looking forward to next year!
So, now I'll update several weeks in one shot and hope this makes up for my slacking off.
Mark finished his last radiation treatment on Monday (the 22nd). That Thursday we were back in the office again with Mark complaining of things not tasting good. Turns out he managed to get thrush in his mouth. Apparently it's caused by a fungus (yeast) that most of us have on our bodies naturally anyways. Usually our immune system will help keep its abnormal growth in check, but since Mark's immune system is anything but normal at the moment, the fungus (yeast) got out of control and now he has thrush (and subsequently can't eat too much of anything solid without getting sick)
We have tried a couple of different things to get rid of it. He was on an oral pill for a while, but that didn't even seem to make a dent. After a few slightly frustrating phone calls to the doctors offices (yes, two of them), we were basically told they had no idea what to do about it since that didn't work. On a spur of the moment trip to a women's cancer survivor support group at the radiation office, the nurse there was surprised that who ever I talked to didn't have an answer, and she had me bring Mark back in to see the doctor the next day. Mark got a new prescription for an oral wash. He does not love that stuff (it is so nasty! - I made the mistake of trying just a tiny drop of it - just so I knew what it was I was pushing Mark to do when he didn't want to swish the meds in his mouth - yea, I'm not doing that again...) We thought it was making a difference, and it might be, but it's not enough. He still can't eat. We're coming up on 3 weeks soon.
On a positive note, he's lost a lot of the extra weight the steroids put on him! Somehow I'm sure that not eating for the last few weeks has helped with that...
-------------
Over the last weekend in July we went on our Annual Gardner Campout. Technically, it was the first year, but we're pretending we've been doing this for as long as we can remember... :) We went to Flaming Gorge and had a blast. Mark still couldn't eat, my brother had a rather severe reaction to a bite (bite on his back - face and lips swollen... yea, it was pretty bad), Emily got lost hiking, everyone was filthy - the youngest of us got that the worst, it rained two of the nights, and we brought way too much food with us that we had to sort through to find what we were cooking for any given meal.
Actually, that makes it sound bad, but it really was fun to get to see everyone and most of us have camping gear that rarely gets used, so it was fun to break that out. We even got to see some old friends that we haven't seen in years. Greg and Paula heard of our camping trip and came and spent a night with us. It was fun to see them again and spend some time catching up and playing games. We all got to go to the Dinosaur museum in Vernal (where we randomly ran into friends that Mark knew growing up and that we had gone to church with for a while before we moved). We also got to go the water at Flaming Gorge and played there for a while, some swimming, some toe dipping, some skipping rocks. We made s'mores and wump-ums, roasted starbursts and sour gummy worms (not sure I recommend that last one - it was an experiment for my Dad, but he didn't seem impressed and apparently it was hard to get them to stay on the stick...), we got an astronomy lesson with a laser pointer (on the first night before the clouds started taking over the evenings) and the kids stayed up late and went on many hikes with aunts, uncles, dads, and grandparents (no, I did not go with them, I'm a horrible mother - and I'm many months pregnant - hiking is not currently my thing... I'm just glad that other people were willing to take that part over for me :) )
After all is said done, we're looking forward to next year!
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